Tuesday, October 12, 2004

Words that give me the booboojeebies

I know it's popular to pick on 'metrosexuals'. They're railed against as queers, fags, fairies, pussies, etc., etc. I couldn't give a fuck less about the lifestyle. What keeps nagging at my neurons is the word itself. Metrosexual. Something just didn't seem right about this. Being a word nerd, and armed with the dictionary.com toolbar, I made the following (quite disturbing) discovery.

Ok, so we all know that 'hetero' is the prefix for 'different'. Different + want to fuck = heterosexual. Heteros have the hots for people who carry different lures in their tacklebox. Obviously. And of course 'homo' means the same. Who can forget jugs of homogenized milk with a big "HOMO" sticker on the cap, meaning that the milk and whey and crap have all been blended together? Homosexuals flock together with birds of their own feather. Duh.

Enter 'metro'. So this is one we all know and love. It's a big city, right? Well, it's true that 'metrosexual' is a portmanteau of 'metropolis' and 'heterosexual' (much like smoke + fog = smog), denoting an urban upper-class (slightly prissy) male. What worries me, though, is that while most morphemes create a new word entirely (chortle, wikipedia, etc.), this one coins a word that by the laws of grammar technically already exists, but has an entirely different meaning.

'Metro' means uterus or mother. Metrosexual. Think about it.

Blarf.

1 Comments:

Blogger Grover said...

You would think of that, wouldn't you?

12:54 PM  

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