Thursday, July 27, 2006

So here I am in my room at Mom and Chuck's house. As I sit here typing, I look over at my bed, and it seems unfamiliar. Thinking to Sophie's bed, it feels like home. I spend so many nights there that I feel, quite oppositely, that I am merely a visitor in my own bedroom. I will sleep here tonight, as I have done since that post written last November about the first night spent as a truly single man:

The water was shut off yesterday, so after taking Caro and her man Scott to the airport to pick up their rental car, they went down to Viv's to shower and spend the night. I headed home. My real home. Mom's. I asked (for manners' sake) if I could stay there that night, and said I had a few errands to run. So with what little of my paycheck was left, I went out. Driving away, I kept repeating in my head the line from Delerium's song Firefly:

"There's a requiem, a new congregation. And it's telling me go forward and walk under a brighter sky, every nerve glowing like a firefly."

One full tank of gas later, I headed over to Dollar General. Uber-redneck in there, but their generic products are so damn cheap. Picked up some bathroom cleaning and laundry supplies. Mom said I could use hers, but I want to impose as little as possible. Headed over to Meijer for the pack of pictures (that sunset I mentioned a week or so ago), and I'm super pleased with the quality of their processing, as well as Fuji 100 speed. God, you guys have to see these. I'll do what I can, the computer gets moved after work and I'll be back online late this evening. I pick up some mouthwash and toothpaste.

Leaving, I realize I don't have a hairbrush or trashcan, so I head over to Wal-Mart. I've got pictures there, forgot to pick them up, so I meander about trying to think of things I need. I pick out a big tacky clear neon green hairbrush and a wastebasket that's on clearance for $2. After perusing injet photo cartridge and picture frame prices, I get a can of chunky soup for dinner.

All along, I notice how much brighter and saturated the colors in the stores are. The smells are so intense, and sounds echo in my ears like never before. I see all the other shoppers, every last one of them busily and hurriedly going about their tasks, oblivious to the sheer beauty and joy of these stores. I pity them for missing it.

At home, I take a shower and inflate mom's camping air mattress in my room. I slide open the casement window and look out to Michelle and Daniel's back yard behind the house across the street. I'll have to hang out with them soon.

Laying down in the dark, I reacquaint myself with sights unseen for ages... the way the street light casts a glare in the back corner by the closet, the way passing cars' headlights slide from wall to wall before disappearing. I miss the guitar chords and Doors posters that were taken down ages ago, but I would otherwise be looking up at. I forgot how the baseboard heater smells like it's burning, and its familiar tink tink tink tink sound. I take a deep breath and close my eyes with my hands behind my head. My right elbow seeks out the feel of the edge of the mattress.

I realize... I've laid down on "my side" of the bed. It just feels right. With a grin, I fall asleep.


And here I am, a man no longer single, yet still recalling Delerium's song lyrics. As I sit and think of Sophie in her bedroom a little under an hour's drive away, maybe asleep or maybe reading a book by the one single desk lamp clamped to her headboard, I hear their line:

"...go forward and walk under a brighter sky! Every nerve glowing like a firefly."


Before, it was the incomprehensible sense of hope, and freedom and from a repressive marriage that set my soul aglow.

Now, it's the God-blessed freedom from loneliness. Also, it's a totally unfamiliar kind of Hope, the likes of which I've never felt before. It's Sophie.
Ruben and friends outside the L&V monday night. It was perfectly warm and not too humid. What an amazing night. We were sitting under sodium street lights and tungsten bulbs, and I debated what whte balance to use to capture the moment. I decided to leave the photos with a lingering orange-yellow cast to complete the "street scene" mood. Posted by Picasa
This is white balanced. Honestly, I think I like the ones where the color is closer to the orangey sodium light as my eye saw it. Posted by Picasa
Ruben. Ring leader, head-honch, zen-master, and all-around swell guy. Posted by Picasa
Outside "The Leaf" Posted by Picasa
Eerie lingering sky light. I think this was a several-second exposure. Maybe the light was coming from the Troy High School football stadium, just opposite the river from the courthouse? Posted by Picasa
A friend of Ruben's who is also a photography enthusiast. I forget her name, but she loved my prints on display in the bathroom. She said to me "I love your work in the bathroom." (referring to the prints I framed), to which I jokingly replied "Out of context, that sound really really bad!". She has two prints for sale inside, both of which warrant a certain amount of merit.  Posted by Picasa
A Miami County Sheriff passing by with full lights and siren going. There was a ton of cruisers zipping here and there. I had no idea Troy was such an active place on a monday night. Posted by Picasa
Outside L&V. This place is next door. I bought the special watch batteries for my Nimslo 3D camera there. Posted by Picasa
Converted to black and white, this got class-wide approval as being a strong image, yet very quiet. They said that you can almost hear the clock ticking. Posted by Picasa
Converted to black and white, this one went over very well in my Photo Design class critique. Posted by Picasa

Monday, July 24, 2006

I feel so loved.

Even after not updating for so long, I'm not done posting all my photos before Nan checks in and leaves comments. What faithful readers!

(I wish I could say the same about myself)

News of late in a nutshell:
1) Did my first corporate portrait gig for the Troy Foundation's leaders, having borrowed a flash from Elizabeth.

2) Took my first photo with a view camera. You know, those ones with the bellows and the dude under the cloth. Camera technology hasn't changed very much. Large format cameras are essentially still just boxes with film on one end and a lens on the other.

Other than that, I should be changing my oil and replacing my brake pads and rotors. I have the parts on hand, I'm just enjoying this rare few hours if inactivity too much to get off my ass.
At the Dayton Art Institute, where my Photo Design class had a field trip to view the "Aperture at 50" exhibit. I love love love Edward Hopper's paintings, and Dayton, Ohio is the resting place of one of his masterpieces, "High Noon". The lighting is kinda cruddy on the painting, but I wanted at least to get his name. Posted by Picasa
At the Dayton Art Institute. Posted by Picasa
At the Dayton Art Institute. Posted by Picasa
At the Dayton Art Institute. Posted by Picasa
At the Dayton Art Institute. Posted by Picasa
At the Dayton Art Institute. Posted by Picasa
At the Dayton Art Institute. Posted by Picasa
At the Dayton Art Institute. Isn't the light on this absolutely perfect? Posted by Picasa
At the Dayton Art Institute. Posted by Picasa
At the Dayton Art Institute. Posted by Picasa
Parker at sunrise. Posted by Picasa
Trystan (foreground) and Parker at sunrise. Posted by Picasa
In the horse pasture. Posted by Picasa
In the horse pasture. Posted by Picasa
In the horse pasture. Posted by Picasa